Last month in this blog we talked about blind spots and what happens when we choose to ignore them.
We learned blind spots can impact our relationships in many different ways. This month, we will continue exploring this topic from a slightly different perspective.
Today we will cover the following:
- Where do blind spots come from in the first place?
- Why is it easier to notice and address some things, and so much harder to notice others?
Humans are drawn to what is safe and familiar. That is one of the reasons it can be challenging to notice when a pattern has stopped being helpful – it’s familiar, and that alone has a hugely soothing effect on us.
A pattern, or “what we have always done,” can be so powerful that it can keep us from noticing that what we have always done.. is not working anymore. This can be the start of a “blind spot.”
When something isn’t working anymore, it can be scary. In fact, it can be so scary, that it feels safer not to look at it. After all, if we don’t acknowledge something, then it can’t be that big of a deal… right ?
Something will not “go away” or correct itself simply because we choose to ignore it. In fact, the opposite is true. The more we avoid thinking about something, or verbalizing it out loud, the harder it feels.
Here are three ways to know if you are avoiding an issue:
- I feel like I’m walking on eggshells around my partner.
- I feel the need to choose my words very carefully.
- I feel a sense of discomfort when emotions come up.
Does any of this sound true in your life? Awareness is often the starting point to making a change and taking the next steps to correct it might involve talk therapy.
READY FOR CHANGE?
If you’re ready to make a change; and would like some help. Please feel free to reach out to the team here at the Center for Intimacy, Connection and Change. We are here for you.