Relationships are dynamic, and it’s challenging to lay out any one “rule” that will hold true for everyone. Connection is a spectrum, and people need different things to create and maintain those feelings. However, being able to trust is a key piece when it comes to building a solid foundation.
When people struggle to trust their partner, it creates a distance that feels hard to bridge. Couples can try to communicate, yet a lack of trust will keep the words from landing. This is especially true when one of the partners has experienced trauma.
Trauma has become a common term in recent years. It is also a broad one. Loosely, it is an experience that the individual perceives as negative and is not processed in a healthy, adaptive way.
Events can become “stuck.” When two people enter into a relationship, they both bring their traumas. No one is totally baggage-free, and part of a healthy partnership is about learning about your partner.
Once trust has been broken in a partnership, it can feel especially hard to repair, and a tough cycle forms. You may find yourself looking at your partner as they offer reassurance and find it hard to believe them the way you once did. This is normal! Trust takes time to build and can take time to repair as well.
Ways to navigate rebuilding trust:
- Learn how to communicate about your partner’s needs, especially in areas where trust has been broken.
- Explore what “trustworthy” feels and looks like to you and your partner.
- Be aware that it can take time and offer yourselves compassion.
READY FOR A CHANGE?
If any piece of this resonates with you, and you are ready to become more intentional about how you manage disappointment, reach out to me at naami@centericc.com
